The Way It Is.

I don't usually hate.
i don't usually have unbearable animosity for anyone.
but this one girl. ugh.

every single time i log on a 'certain social networking client',
i see her status updates or activities and i proceed to her profile.
the reason i do this is always the same:
to see if she has finally gained some level of respect for herself.
every time i am sorely disappointed.

she parades her body on this network in skimpy, trashy outfits.
when i say skimpy i mean, really skimpy.
think undies and tube bra ish outfits (maybe a tad exaggerated) .
full body length shots, mind you. or if its not that,
she's probably lying on her bed in a tank top
and taking pictures which deliberately stress on
her face and importantly, cleavage.
but i have seen her size in real life, and believe me,
she is not that well-endowed.

anyhoo, she has been taking these provocative pictures
since she was about 15.

if you think these lewd pictures are her limit, you are wrong.
at the ripe age of 15 the last thing she should be doing
is broadcasting herself as a sort of "play thing".
however, in her About Me section of her profile she beckons
guys to "message me if you like what you see".

now THAT is what gets me the most.
everytime i read that sentence, i go berserk.
i know i am no angel either, but this "girl" is
completely on another level.
i just think it is so wrong. i guess this is the
price of the materialistic world.

we all know women (and quite a number of men too)
like to camwhore. i think that's no big deal as long as
you have your borderline set right.
i will continue checking her profile and praying that
she will realise what she's doing to herself.

perhaps it is not hate which i feel.
perhaps it is sympathy. or some feeling of
obligation towards this girl.

i really worries me that once upon a
time not too long ago i almost went down the same path.
i used to be engrossed in getting attention.
pretty pictures everywhere on my profile.
never provocatively dressed, but still.
i used my looks for the wrong reasons. however,
i am proud to say that the pressure of the materialistic
world has become something i no longer fuss about.
i am happy that i have found myself and i have realised
that i have so much more to offer than the physical things.

perhaps i feel an obligation towards her because
i need a reason to believe that i have fully changed.
perhaps i am disgusted that i used to be on the same path,
less demeaning but equally revolting, hence her realisation
will prove to myself that there was never a chance that i
would end up like her. that i never went cheap.

anyhoos, i pray that she will recover from this phase.
i'd hate to think that the future generation of women
will be largely made up of young women with little self-respect.
i hope this will not become a pandemic.

M.I.A.

i have been away for much too long.
it seems harder for me to put my thoughts
on paper, or in this case on the laptop screen.
just so much has happened since OH MY GOD wrapped.

belated Xmas and New Year greetings to everyone!
my internet was very the cacat over the past weeks,
resulting in my absence in cyberworld which is my means
of communicating and spamming with everyone.
And also a very heartfelt thanks to all the people
who came for OMG and those who smsed wishes.
sorry for not replying but as you all know
my handphone is currently in my dad's control.

School has definitely dampened the hype i had through december,
but i've made a new years resolution which i know i shall fail to keep:

TO COMPLETE ALL MY HOMEWORK, ESPECIALLY BAHASA MALAYSIA,
CHEMISTRY, BIOLOGY, HISTORY, PHYSICS, ENGLISH AND MATHS.

that's a long list of subjects that weren't taken seriously last year,
homework wise at least.
i never see the point in doing notes. i just don't get it.
and i don't see the point in my compiling exercises neatly
in books and files. i prefer
doing it all in my head, though i know it is not half as effective.
but it has not failed me yet.

even through the first week of school,
i've managed to "forget" to do maths homework.
i am truly talented in the field of forgetting
or pretendung to forget.

but yes my resolution is to terminate that habit.
its a very very long shot.

i'll be stopping by KLPac on he 18th for the open day.
i probably will just lepak around and reminisce.
nostalgia and i are bestfriends.