Tuesday, March 8, 2011

I'm not okay, but I'll be alright?

I don't want you think of her every time you think of me. I don't like this similarity we seem to have 'cause now I believe I'll always be compared. I hate it.

I know we're new (so new) but I like you. Really. It's kinda saddening for me to imagine this little thing might remain a one sided affair for the rest of what's left of it.

It's days like these when I wish I was pretty, I wish I knew the right things to say, I wish I had natural charm and grace and I wish I knew how to make you mine.

Ultimately, I wish I was someone other than me.

'Cause quite apparently, you don't think of me the way I think of you; I think you're pretty fucking perfect and I think ANY girl would be lucky to have you. It's equaled to winning the fucking lottery or getting pair aces twenty times in a row during black jack. I'd be so ridiculously insane. Well, I am already. Is that creepy?

I hate that the Disney movies I watched as a kid have set this standard of romance for me. I feel like I have to get the person I want. I'll succeed pretty fine on my own, but I still believe there's something missing without romance or affection. Is that pathetic? I think it is; I think I am.

Why can't I just win? or why can't I just fall for someone less perfect? Why can't I just fall for someone who's available, who wants to love me back?

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